These are the building blocks of change: hope, threshold, and consistency. Without these three critical components, intentional change is almost impossible.

Hope is the predecessor to change – without hope, there is no action. Hope is required for any behavior to happen. Think about it – if you didn’t think your efforts mattered, you wouldn’t bother. Hope can be something you see for yourself in the future, or something that’s felt. Whether you experience one or both, you must be able to envision change or feel the surge of emotions that come with the possibility of change to create action. For example, if you don’t have any hope in getting a better job, you won’t take action to fix your resume or leave your old, draining job.

Building block two: you must meet threshold to create change. In order to meet threshold, there are three things that need to be in place; 1. There must be change, 2. It must be me who creates the change, and 3. Change must happen now. The first priority of my consultation/screening calls with clients is to assess this point. If you’re not at threshold, it doesn’t matter how much I kick and scream, how magnificent I am at my job – you won’t create lasting change. The human need to avoid pain before we seek pleasure helps us to meet threshold. The need to avoid pain puts us in a place where the locus of change, the urgency of change, and the absolute certainty and need for change is concrete. You can leverage this knowledge. If you want to get yourself to threshold faster so that you can take your life further, think about the pain that comes from not changing now. Not just tomorrow, or next year, but I mean lifelong change. One simple act of decision now alters the course of your life forever.

The third magical piece of the puzzle to enact successful change is consistency. I had a client in the past who gobbled up every piece of information learned through our sessions. Application of knowledge came easily – in the beginning. Things fizzled out and she continued to return to past/habituated behaviors. She wanted to stay together with her spouse, despite unresourceful behaviors they had both adopted. She began the work she needed to develop herself and change how she reacted to her everyday interactions with her spouse. After a week, she began to become complacent and stopped doing the work in between the sessions; and at the rate that she stopped sowing her garden, her relationship garden began to dry up and whither away. With just a tweak in her limiting beliefs and some self-care, her garden sowing became regular and enjoyable. Consistency is key to creating any lasting change. Take care of what needs to be taken care of – so that consistency becomes an unconscious habit (e.g., self-care, limiting beliefs, etc).

Luckily, once change seems possible, creating the change to avoid pain becomes significantly urgent. Doing what needs to be done consistently – everyday –  comes easily and naturally once it aligns with who you are and who you hold yourself to be in your particular map of the world. If you live congruently and your need for change fits into that congruent schema of your life and your world, change comes effortlessly.



Contact Me if you’re ready to stop living small and  want to begin your life transformation today.

You need to live YOUR life. No one else can, or ever will. Your life is your gift. Don’t waste it. #SingularPresence


Photo courtesy of @brunus